An Unexpected Treat

So today I went to morning worship service at Anaheim Vineyard and looked for my friend Nackwon to sit with. Don gave me an invite for the International Students Valentine's Party. I think I would like to attend! And, Jane made a home made Korean cooked pork with kimchi and rice cake. I came home to cook rice and am just about to enjoy it. She had prepared it for some friends but she didn't see them at the church so she offered to give it to me. Wow~my lucky day! In this small way God showed me His love for me (onetheme of the morning service today). Thanks, God!!

Sorrow

So today I got a double dose of sorrow. First of all, I was feeling like "no one cares about me". Then, someone jokingly said they don't care about me really, and it stung me to the core and brought me to tears. The thing is, I know in my head that this is NOT true. Of course I have family and friends that DO care and love me, but the emotions have a strange way of making me sentimental. So, that was the first.

Then, I've been feeling disconnected from my roommates. And, they have VOTED me out! Ouch! So, I am being forced to find a new place to live by the end of the month. What I know in my head is that God is moving and will provide for me. And yet, a part of my heart is not certain that God will come through for me on my behalf. So this is my second sorrow of the day. God is in control, but right now I don't like the journey. Instead of being smooth it feels a little bit bumpy, and I don't like it.

A Friend Stays Over

My good friend Hanna came to visit this past week. What a blessing it was to see her, talk with her, and hang out together. My other friend, Nackwon, let us stay over her home. Nackwon offered us some WONDERFUL hospitality. She let us stay over her house, and we listened to Hanna share stories of her life. Nackwon put out fresh towels, shampoo, soap and body lotion for us and even prepared a Korean style breakfast, with kimchi and fresh fruit. I was thankful for her kindness, and from my point of view it was fun to see 2 of my friends meet and hit it off.

Gratitude Today

So lately I've been kind of bummed about my living arrangement. I live with 3 other gals and we each have our own room. But, one of the roommates has been out of town for the past 2 months, and I've been left alone with the other 2. I think what a wonderful opportunity for us girls to connect and live in community with each other. This was my unspoken expectation upon moving in. However, my actual experience in living with these women has been anything but. So disappointing. However, instead of dwelling on the disappointment I've decided to look elsewhere for my communal experiences. With my family. With my friends. With new friends too. I spent the holidays with my family. I visited with them more last week. And I made appointments with the girls to connect and reconnect. I feel this is God's way of pushing me out into new, mutually satisfying, edifying relationships! In addition, my roommates are not all bad. They have each contributed something of positive, tangible value to me. One girl lent me an extra bed she had so I could sleep on. Another lent me a desk to use. And a dresser too. I didn't have any of these when I came back from Korea. So, I do appreciate that the girls have helped me out in this way. And I need to choose to just keep thinking positively!

Scott Brown Wins Massachucets...

Scott Brown, a republican, wins the senate seat in the state of Massachucets. Wow, amazing!

Today was the weather from crayze-ville. Tornado warnings in southern California? I heard trees fell on cars. And, Ruby's restraunt near the beach closed down. I saw lightening and heard thunder. Very very unusual weather for southern cal.

On a brighter note, was so glad to visit with my family for a bit tonight. Just got picked up from my mom after work. Picked up some fast food from El Pollo Loco AND also from The Flame Broiler for dinner. Had dinner together and spent time talking together. Special because we don't usually get together as a family except for holidays and birthdays!! ha ha...a little sad but true...so, it was a nice time for us being together...good for the heart...and, good for the soul...

Sigh...they say it's gonna rain 3 more storms this week...stronger one tomorrow...strange for here...

Sticky Roommate Situation

I'm not sure if it's just me or what, but, living with roommates can be a challenge. In my situation we share a house rental together. What a wonderful opportunity! And, yet, what a tragedy too. It seems we don't "connect" well together. We all lead our own, separate lives. Too bad. Because, I believe people are designed to live in community. So, I'll do my best to live in harmony with these girls, but I feel so sad sometimes. Hello, I'm here. Don't ignore me please. Like, do I really have to always be the one to greet you first? And, if I don't talk with you first , would you even talk with me? We seem to share the bills together, but that's about it. I'm sure life was meant to be more than this! I'm certain of it!

Why Join a Home Group?

I am so glad I joined a home group. There are so many benefits to joining one. Friendships. Friendships with God. Friendship with other believers. Prayer. Prayer to God. Prayer with other believers. Praying for others. Letting others pray for you and lay their hands on you. Worship. Singing songs to God. Talking. Talking about life. The Bible. Learning from God and from each other. I am so glad, and so grateful for the homegroup I get to be a part of at this time in my life. I hope and believe that some of these friendships that are being formed now will last a lifetime. Some of the friends from the group are "old" friends from the past. Others are "new" friendships. But, I love this group, and have immense gratitude in my heart for our group. It is special. My heart feels so full right now. I feel full, fulfilled, and blessed. It is God having poured out his spirit on the group and giving life to us. Yaye, God!!! I hope that if you get a chance you too will join a home group. The benefits to you will last both now and a lifetime, into eternity. You will experience life, and more life!! I thank God for each person in our homegroup; what a blessing each person is, whether they realize it or not. And, that's it for now. Until next time...let's keep our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith.

Trajedy in Death

Senseless. Shock and disbelief. Anger. A range of emotions is what I feel after finding out about the death of a co-worker recently. She was only 18. Hit by a drunk driver. Why was she out so late Saturday nite? Where were her parents and/or guardians? Who can make sense of a young girl dying, when she had so much potential and life to live? What was the purpose of her life? What about God's perspective? When is a person "of age" in God's eyes to be responsible for knowledge of salvation? Was she saved? Where will she spend eternity? These are some of the questions I've been asking myself lately. These are some of the things that I've been grappling with lately. And, the pain her parents, not to mention her boyfriend, are going through. It breaks my heart to know their pain and deep grief. And, why her and not me, or someone else? Why did she have to die? It doesn't make any sense to me. And, the drunk driver; he's ruined his own life. He will have to sit in a jail for the rest of his life, if not the majority of it. He was only 37. So, not only did he ruin a young girl's life, but, he's ruined his own as well. My message is this: friends, don't let friends drive drunk!! Period. And, what about the bar owners? Should they not be held responsible too, after all, they're the ones who served the alcohol. This kind of thing happens everyday. It is especially sad when it hits closer to home. Makes me wake up and kind of take an inventory of life. Makes me want to tell all the people close to me how much I appreciate them. My second message is this: tell the people you love that you love them. Tell the people you appreciate that you appreciate them. Let the people around you know that you care, and are there for them. Make the most of every moment. This is the life. This is what I'm thinking about these days.